To the right is a screenshot from the blog "F My Life". People post the situations that make them hate their life. Or just really awkward situations ( I mean really, what's the difference?). The posts are short, and people can vote whether or not the person deserved it. I've become addicted to reading this site. It's nice to know that there are people out there that are as awkward as I am...The process of writing a personal narrative for this class hasn't been exactly easy for me. I chose to write about an experience that I never share with anyone. Even my roommate, whom I've known since I was 5, doesn't know about my foray into the Craigslist personals.
When I think about why I don't share this story often I usually can't come up with a good reason, other than it reminds me of a very specific time in my life, a time that needs context and set up, and feels very in the past from where I am today. But, I was compelled to blog about it here, because, in doing this project I have taken up reading Craigslist again.
Today, while working on my second draft I came across this on the "Missed Connections" page:
(This is a picture of a Post Secret postcard)
Several months ago we had sex a few times and although you used a condom you must have torn it when you put it on because a few weeks after I learned that I was pregnant and yes it was your baby because as you and I both talked about I hadn't had sex with anyone since 13 months before you. Unfortunetly I miscarried our child. I wasn't going to tell you about the pregnancy or the miscarriage due to your religious beliefs and how your family would react and disown you, but I can't hold it in my heart anymore. Even though our baby is gone we both need to come to terms that this baby was your first and even though he/she died, the baby was a creation of both of us and deserves acknowledgment. I won't tell you my name, just know that i'm someone that truely enjoyed our times together as did you and next time you have sex PLEASE make sure the condom isn't torn. As you said your parents would flip if they found out you were having sex before marriage and had an outside child.....Your name starts with an H....i'm not from ann arbor but you are.
Wow. What a loaded post. After I finished reading it, it made me wonder about the circumstances of her situation. Why didn't she call him? Did she not have his phone number? I wondered if they had met on the Casual Encounters section. Was she doing this because she knows he reads this page? Or was this more meant to make her feel better about the situation?(This is a screenshot of the Craigslist Missed Connections)
I would agree with most people when they say
that technology has changed, and in some ways degraded, the way we interact with one another. Yet, sometimes technology enables us to say the things we need to say under the veil of anonymity, without real world consequences. I wonder though, if the experience of writing something down and posting it on the internet is enough to clear one's mind.
Craigslist, Post Secret, Fuck my Life, and countless other forums and blogs act as a space for people to share their stories and secrets with no strings attached.
Short of throwing a message in a bottle or sending an anonymous letter, this form of sharing with strangers seems to be particularly New Media to me. Does this mean that people just used to keep things to themselves more often, or do we just not share with each other anymore? At least in my case, I've found reading about other people's lives to be comforting when I'm feeling down or bad about life in general. I can commiserate with that human experience, even when I don't know the person. I also relate to the need to talk with someone, but someone you don't know, anonymously. I'm not sure why, but I've always had trouble sharing. I don't mean sharing what I did during the day or having deep conversations, but things that are deeply personal to me I almost never share. It's why I keep a real journal.
To me, these forums mean that we can be personal at a distance, something that is oddly comforting to people like myself. There are consequences to that. The fact that I can post anywhere, and say anything I need to say, means that I don't have to be close to the people that actually affect my life. I'm taking one form of social interaction and replacing it with another, more abstract version. And I'm not the only one doing this, a lot of people are. I think that will have consequences for society in general in the future. Maybe we'll continue to become more distant in person, but closer in "virtual reality"...Maybe we'll continue to post our most personal encounters on the Missed Connections page, which seems to be a fitting title.
images via:
Ann Arbor Missed Connections (Screen Shot)
Fmylife.com
Post Secret:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKD29eOBIvYcANJEvsuPGjmh9SYxS9zjNDvW1Dh6kweAEsi1U8gy_pvespGSUT6pnAUQffnVwC49Pt8cwQra4Y2W-mUpXypldtkxuKJcovrDGwfVhya13FoH6vp3GEDZ42lAmPA9rSH5ZR/s1600-h/catscratchfever.jpg
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmo4YV6hMgPWlL5yjjUHcSHHMbQ_VA0qy3XIsZevjpyc9lJFrsRRf0Qt7Ha1gg1rsdWDblOEMEhCB60l4Zp8g6NR3v4xQDHvTtWknhQubkzoF434Yt0-9JIQU1rWOFfztPdzwVkNd72nUv/s1600-h/foucault.jpg
